22 May, 2010

I wish I was making this shit up

Alright, kids. I will share with you one of my ultimate pet-peeves... You know what? "Pet-peeve" doesn't quite cover it. Let's just say it irritates the fuck out of me.

Some fucking assholes stupidly-passionate Queen fans ripping on other music for no other reason than that musician or band is either nothing at all like Queen, or they're obviously influenced by them and that makes them THE DEVIL!

Muse, Mika, Lady Gaga, My Chemical Romance, Green Day - to name but a few, are apparently fuckers because THEY'RE NOT QUEEN OMGROFLBBQWTFNASABRUCEWILLIS!!!! And yet, HOLY FUCK THEY SOUND A LITTLE LIKE THEM SO THEY MUST DIE OMGLOLCAT!!111!!

Seriously, go to Queenzone and just skim through the forums. I'll wait. I'm not sure how accessible the site is, but I'll keep waiting.

Honestly if I had to pick between having a conversation with Fred Phelps and most other Queen fans, I'd pick Fred. Fred would at least very nicely call me a faggot and condemn me to eternal hellfire and an AIDS-related death.

Now if Mika pulled a stunt like Vanilla Ice did with Ice Ice Baby, then it would be okay to say he was ripping Queen off. But you guys? He isn't. And for that matter, Freddie was not the first singer to hit the high notes while playing piano. Brian's not the first guy in Earth's history to build an electric guitar. Roger's not the only drummer who wore sun glasses. John's not the only bass player who didn't give himself nearly enough credit, etc. I'm pretty sure there are Led Zeppelin fans bitching about Queen II sounding too similar to anything Robert Plant was doing. And even further - oh snap! All the members of Queen were from England! Just like The Beatles! How fucking dare there be any other band from England just like The Beatles?! And if we want to stretch it further: all these fuckers played piano before you did, Freddie! Fuck you for ripping off Johann Sebastian Bach!

I don't think they know how stupid that sounds. Why can't those fans chill the fuck out and be happy that Queen is influencing some really fucking awesome music? I like Lady Gaga, okay?! I'm not ashamed to admit that I bought The Fame Monster and listen to it almost as often as I listen to My Chemical Romance's The Black Parade.

And then there's the other side: Bands and musicians who sound absolutely nothing like Queen, and therefore they're terrible! Recent examples people bring up seem to be Miley Cyrus and The Jonas Brothers. I mean yeah, they're fucking awful - but not because they sound nothing like the music of 30+ years ago. Yes, it's cool to listen to classic rock, but I feel very sorry for anyone who's willing to close themselves off to all but one or two decades of music. Considering how long music itself has existed, to only stick to the 60's and 70's (and 80's and early 90's if you're into the later Queen stuff) is like only uploading two songs on a 160GB iPod (read: I own a 160GB iPod). Or insisting on keeping AOL 4.0 in this day and age.

I mean, if that's what they want to do, then so be it. But I don't think it's fair to call my Queen fandom into question ("YOU'RE NOT A TRUE QUEEN FAN! GO FUCK OFF AND DIE, YOU MEANINGLESS SACK OF SHIT!!" would be putting it nicely) just because I also listen to other stuff - whether they're incorporating their love of Queen in their music or not.

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